


Professional Heartbreakers

by SilverAmoebasquid



Series: 2/6/17 FutaYaha Dump [2]
Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: I'm also lying, M/M, i hate them, just. being the worst., literally everyone sucks. except for them, they're just such flirts that i imagine this is how they spend their nights
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-02-06
Updated: 2017-02-06
Packaged: 2018-09-22 08:48:55
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,275
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9597905
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SilverAmoebasquid/pseuds/SilverAmoebasquid
Summary: Kenji and Shigeru are taking a night on the town, which means they're crashing a party as best they can. Because they're the worst and they love to lead people on just to throw them back down in the dirt. The salt and sass levels are OVERWHELMING.





	

Shigeru licked his lips, gaze unwavering from the sight in front of him.

Loud music thrummed from speakers mounted on the wall. There was a football game on the television, but it wasn’t playing any sound. A couple of the high schoolers were sitting on the leather couch, soda in red solo cups threatening to splash over as they jumped to their feet as a touchdown was scored. There were numerous small groups of teenagers talking amongst themselves near the walls of the large area, pretending they were too cool to be here. That was a huge facade. The large basement lounge belonged to the family of two of the coolest kids at Johzenji. The older one was the quarterback for their football team while his sister captained the cheer team. No one was too cool for the exclusive parties where there was enough food and drink for a group twice their size and noise complaints were ignored. Only fifty or so kids from the school were ever invited and it would stick with you forever. People who attended a party here were revered the rest of their days in high school. They held themselves differently and were automatically backed by everyone else. Hardly anyone ever got kicked out of the group, but Shigeru was going to upset the balance. His goal had never been to enjoy the festivities here. His goal had been to cause as much chaos as possible. That had led to calling in a few favors from Terushima and obtaining the secret information on the time and location of this party.

Shigeru glanced around to where his “plus one” was sipping something hopefully non-alcoholic across the room.

Kenji gestured with a barely perceptible tilt of his chin and Shigeru looked in that direction. A game of billiards was taking place on one side of the large space and Shigeru noted with a small smile that a short girl with brown hair and a white mini-skirt was kicking ass, the dude she was up against scowling and shoving his hands into the pockets of his varsity jacket. She had attracted a small crowd of fans around her, all of whom Shigeru ignored when he stood up from the barstool to wander over. The girl sunk the last ball and her small following cheered for her and teased the guy who had lost. She had a smug grin on her face and she intentionally paid no mind to the people trying to talk to her, though she was clearly drinking in the attention.

Shigeru snuck up beside her, tapping her shoulder lightly.

Caught by surprise, she didn’t have a chance to slyly slide away from him and within seconds, Shigeru’s arm was around her waist as they walked away from the pool table.

“That was some nice playing,” Shigeru said. “It was nice to see someone knock him off his self-righteous mountain.”

The girl smirked. “My thoughts exactly. Thank you for taking notice.”

“How could I not notice someone like you?”

She grinned cheekily. “I have a boyfriend, you know.”

“So do I,” Shigeru said in a joking tone of voice. He knew about her boyfriend. Kenji would be distracting him now.

She stopped walking to turn to him directly, eyes flitting over his face as she smiled. “I don’t even know who you are.”

Shigeru cupped her cheek. “Back atcha. You gonna let that get in the way?”

Shigeru smiled as she lunged to kiss him. He held her against the wall, letting her take control. So this was how she really felt about her boyfriend. Being a homewrecker was awesome.

 

So the distraction had worked a little too well in this case, Kenji noted, grinding against the other man’s crotch down the hall. Warm hands slid under his shirt and Kenji turned around to press their lips together. His own hands started on the baseball star’s chest and migrated down, down more, a little further...

The other boy pulled away first, his green eyes locking onto Kenji’s brown ones. “If my girlfriend were to find us...”

“Shhh...” Kenji pressed his index finger against the boy’s lips. “I’m pretty sure she’s still playing billiards. You’re fine.”

He still looked troubled. “I was always told to live life like my church’s preacher was in the room with me. Don’t do anything I wouldn’t do if he were watching, that kind of thing.”

Kenji was trying hard not to laugh. “Your preacher would hate me.” Kenji slid his thumbs through the belt loops of the other’s jeans, pulling him closer yet, feeling hesitation and a bit of guilt emanating from his chosen “partner.”

There were hands on his hips and Kenji was smiling in the dark hall. Suddenly his phone buzzed from his pocket and he straightened, pulling away.

“W-where are you going?”

Kenji shrugged as he stepped back into the main area of the basement. “Peace out.”

“What do you mean!?”

Kenji held out his arms in the center of the space, feeling several pairs of eyes on him as Shigeru jumped into his embrace. Kenji snickered and kissed his boyfriend, letting his hands slide down to grab Shigeru’s ass.

“You taste like lipstick,” Kenji commented with amusement, also noting Shigeru’s messed up hair.

“That girl whose man you had was real good. We should get out of here though. That blond dude from earlier found me and is trying to get my pants off.”

Kenji glanced over Shigeru’s shoulder and laid eyes on the blond in question. His mouth was hanging open as he watched the reunion.

“Hey, you could do worse,” Kenji teased. “You were right about this party. Not too shabby.”

“I know,” Shigeru said, putting his hand in Kenji’s back pants pocket as they started for the door. “How many did you get to go along with you?”

“Four,” Kenji stated proudly.

“Dang, I only convinced three to actually make out with me.”

“Oh, well same with me. One girl chickened out after a couple minutes of sweet talk. Got to feel up some boobs with the other chick though.”

Shigeru laughed. “That dude back there is pretty desperate I think. He probably would’ve gone as far as I would’ve let him. I gave him some vague goodbye after he started trying to touch my crotch.”

“Yeah? Looks like he isn’t quite satisfied,” Kenji mused, watching the handsome blond run over and wave to get Shigeru’s attention.

“Hey! You, ah... You didn’t...”

Shigeru mock-pouted. “Oh, I’m sorry. I’m taken though! Better luck next time!”

Kenji smirked and glanced around the basement and noted the several teenagers he and Shigeru had successfully wooed that night. They were all looking over with expressions ranging from confusion to rage.

Shigeru waved casually to the entire room as he and Kenji took to the stairs.

Kenji laughed as they stepped out into the cool night air. “I love fucking up other schools’ social structure.”

“I think of it as my calling,” Shigeru agreed. “With looks like this, it’d be a sin for us not to have a little fun now and then.”

Kenji laughed. “Teru’s going to be mad at us when he finds out that we just upturned the entire social structure of his school.”

Shigeru shrugged. “Well that’s just too bad, isn’t it.”

Kenji smirked and unlocked the doors of his car. “Pick a number between one and thirty, Shi,” he requested as he turned the car on, cranking up the music.

“Twenty!” Shigeru said loudly over the thumping bass.

Kenji shifted into drive and peeled away from the curb. “Twenty over the speed limit the whole way home it is.”

**Author's Note:**

> Disclaimer: I do truly love them and I don't think they're actually jerks? This was really just a silly thing because I do think they take pleasure from unnecessary flirting and making sure they've got a long line of people behind them. And then being assertive in their togetherness. Do not get the wrong idea. They are the best of children, they just have some.... character flaws? Either way, I think they're fantastic and I hope that the entire universe sees this truth as well!! (no but really, they're menaces to society gdi, guys)
> 
> "CHEESY, BREEZY, SUPER EASY LEMON SQUEEZY... flirting 101 I'm not sure what i am witnessing" -Lity


End file.
